This year is not at all what I would have expected. If you had asked me a year, six months or even a few weeks ago, I would not have anticipated where the Lord has me now.

I had big plans for my future. 

In April of my senior year at UNC-Chapel Hill, I was convinced that I was going to be moving to Washington DC to be a legal intern at a large nonprofit. I had all the credentials and the skill-set for the position. I was affirmed time and time again by friends and family,  and I felt strongly that this was where I was going to be. However, one week after graduation. My big plans fell through. Regardless of all my supposed qualifications, I did not get the position.  

After weeks of prayer, I finally started to muster up the courage to see where the Lord was calling me. This is when the Lord opened the door for the Raleigh Fellows program. I interviewed and was incredibly excited to be living in Raleigh and interning in the legal field. I had big plans for this year. I was going to be exposed to the law field and explore career options in this area. However, once again, my big plans fell through. 

This time, I did get my preferred position, but for a variety of reasons, it was not a good fit for me. I won't go into that now because that is a whole different story. For now, though, all that I can say is that my big plans to work in law this year fell through. 

I am now working for Church of the Apostles as their Youth Ministry Intern. My job this year is essentially to hang out with teenagers and tell them about Jesus, and I am incredibly excited about that!  If you would have told me this a year, six months, or even 4 weeks ago, I would not have believed you. "Me, working in ministry? No. I'm thinking about law school. I have an incredible future ahead of me. I have big plans."

However, I have learned that no matter how big my plans are, God's are bigger. I am thrilled to have the opportunity to pour into the lives of kids this year and I know that this is where the Lord wanted me all along. My "big plans" may have fallen through this year, but that means that God's bigger and perfect plan has prevailed. 

I have no idea what this year is going to entail, and I'm not going to try and plan it out because we have all seen where that has led. Instead, I am going to simply trust that the One who has planned my steps perfectly until this point will continue to do so. 

So for this year as a Raleigh Fellow, here's to not making big plans myself, but instead trusting the Author of the master plan.

-Emily Gebbie

"The heart of man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps." Proverbs 16:9