If you are here hoping to find one of the new Fellows first blogs and thinking that one of them is super on top of things and posted really early, I am sorry to disappoint. I’m just an old washed up Class of 2026 Fellow who felt like he needed to fulfill the obligation of writing an 8th blog. I had a love-hate relationship with these blogs throughout the year but I felt like this one needed to be written. This gives me a place to really tie the bow on my experience.
This summer has been a weird in between period. In between being a Fellow and not. In between being employed and not. In between being an adult and not wanting to be. In between living with my buddies and living at home. But now it is all real. I always figured that Fellows would feel over when the new class showed up and I was correct in that assumption.
I wasn’t sure how I was going to feel with a new class and my new role as Raleigh Fellow Alum. This new title has brought on a lot of different emotions but I think that the one that comes through the most is jealousy. I am jealous that they get to go through this unique experience for the first time. I am jealous that they get to be Ashley’s minions. I am jealous that they get to go on those same retreats we did. I am jealous of the structured chaos that they get to endure week in and week out. If their was no jealousy then I think I would have been doing something wrong!
But right underneath jealousy in my list of emotions is excitement. I am excited that they get to go through this unique experience for the first time. I am excited that they get to be Ashley’s minions. I am excited that they get to go on those same retreats we did. I am excited for their structured chaos. As time goes on the top emotion will quickly fade and the excitement and happiness will take that top spot and never leave as more and more Fellows take on this program.
Having a new weird outside perspective on Fellows does nothing but make me appreciate it more. There is no other way that I could have imagined living the last year of my life. I pray that everyone in this new group will leave the program feeling the same way I do. This community and church will wrap their arms around the new Fellows and help equip them with things they never would have thought of and I can’t wait to be on the other side of it. TYJ for Fellows.
These photos should sum up what I’ve been doing. Happy marriage to the Simases!
-Will Brown
